In case you haven’t heard (I know you’ve been busy) I’ve been on a bit of a social media hiatus for quite some time now. It means I’ve missed out on some important updates; it means I only found out you were even on The Apprentice after you’d already won. I’m sorry about that; I would have liked to offer you my support. The good news is I’m here now, offering you my most sincere congratulations.
After all that’s gone on in between our last encounter I’m sure you can’t even remember me, but I remember you quite intensely. Memories of your Peanut Butter Fudge Cake play vividly through my mind everyday. Honest – I love them even more than Heston Blumenthal did (and I know he was a massive fan.) I loved them SO much I followed you around nearly every food festival in the country just so I could buy them in bulk. (I’m that ridiculously tall girl who speaks a little bit common – although I might have been putting on my pretentious posh voice because I liked you so much. Remember?)
There’s no hard feelings if you don’t remember – I know your stalls were always the busiest so you saw a lot of faces – I’m just grateful for the fact that you remembered me at the time. (I’m even more grateful that you always gave me a bigger piece of cake because of it.) Because your cakes are seriously amazing. So amazing that most of the time they didn’t even survive the journey home (which I hope you take as a compliment rather than just think I’m greedy.) You were doing a fabulous job before you even won The Apprentice so I’m thrilled to see you get some recognition. I never doubted you for a second.
Anyway, that’s enough words for now. I know you’re busy, and I’ve actually got a lot to do myself. The very first item on my list is to go and order some Peanut Butter Fudge Cake, then binge watch all of The Apprentice on BBC iplayer.
Merry Christmas, and all the best for 2017. (Can’t wait to see what you come up with!)
Lots of love
P.s. You know that famously snobbish food festival in the castle? Well…you got the last laugh. And you did it with dignity. (Another reason why you’re amazing.)