How You Saved Me From Becoming A Complete Wreck. 

I’m going to be completely honest now.

Because, with you, I feel like I can be.

I’m sure you’ve gathered by this point that I really really really love writing (I kind of wouldn’t be here if I didn’t.) If there’s ever a time when I’m not writing stuff down, or wondering about what words I can string together next, then I’m not really sure what I’m supposed to do with myself. It’s not just an addiction, it’s a compulsion that is entirely undeniable to me. It’s in my bones, it’s taken over my heart, and – if I’m being completely truthful – it’s the only thing I’ve ever really been certain about.

I can say that now, but it hasn’t always quite so easy to admit.

For the longest time I didn’t tell anybody, instead choosing to keep the passion very much confined to my own heart. It wasn’t because I didn’t want to talk about it – if anything there have been way too many occasions where it’s been the only thing I’ve wanted to talk about – but it’s because I’ve been so cripplingly afraid.

Sure, I liked the way I made the words sound but I certainly didn’t think anybody else would. It was that inherent doubt which made me nervous to ever let anybody even come close to reading my work. I knew that if they showed even the slightest sign of indifference towards it I would be consumed with quiet distress. If they outright criticised it? Well, my heart would be completely flooded with the most agonising kind of grief.

But gradually – and I’m talking super-miniscule baby steps here – I allowed some very special people into this secret, and in doing so I let them read all the things that are most precious to me. When they told me that they liked the way I organised the words on the page, and that all those ridiculous metaphors and excessive adjectives actually provoked the things I hoped they would, it made my heart stop beating. Completely stop. Because it honestly meant that much to me. It encouraged me to let more people into my secret, and although I was completely terrified – and I guess in a lot of ways I still am – it was a good sort of terrified. A kind of terrified I could be excited about.

That’s when I made my mind up to start this blog.

Now here we are, one month in, and you – yes, you! – are saying the things I was afraid I’d never hear. It’s wonderful in so many ways, and it honestly makes my heart beam with overwhelming happiness. In fact it means more coming from you than anybody because you’re not under any social obligation to say it.

Your readership, your following, your likes and your kind words mean the world to me. Because starting this blog? Well, it wasn’t easy for me. But you – yes, you! – have made it so very worthwhile. You’re not just validating me, you’re making me brave enough to tell the world this secret I’ve been keeping for a very long time. You’re making me certain that I did the right thing, and you’re sparing me from being a terrified wreck in the process. For that, I am – and will forever be – exceptionally grateful. ❤️

  One thought on “How You Saved Me From Becoming A Complete Wreck. 

  1. January 7, 2017 at 12:36 pm

    Aww this is so nice to read. You seriously are a better writer than most people, definitely better than anybody I know and this really touched my heart. You should have your own book even! You growing is really inspiring and I look up to people like you

    Liked by 1 person

    • January 7, 2017 at 3:59 pm

      Lindsey this comment has entirely made my day! What a remarkably beautiful compliment you have given me! Thank you so much – it honestly means the world to me ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Evie
    January 7, 2017 at 11:14 pm

    I just came across your blog and I love your posts and your writing style is just so incredibly brilliant! ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

  3. January 8, 2017 at 1:18 am

    I love this because I was and kinda Still am the same way. I used to just keep a journal and keep my thoughts and opinions to myself because I felt like there was nothing I could really contribute with my writing. But we tend to forget that even though we dont necessarily get a comment on every post, someone out there is reading your words and its inspiring them in more ways than you can imagine 😊.
    Loving your blog Claire and your writing!

    Liked by 1 person

    • January 8, 2017 at 8:58 am

      Thank you so much for this lovely comment Nikki – I honestly appreciate your kind words ❤ I’m thrilled you’re enjoying reading…I’m going to go and check yours out now 😊 xx

      Like

  4. January 8, 2017 at 5:41 am

    Your writing is so relaxing to read. Your words and wisdom flow together so well. I have really been enjoying your blog posts♥

    Liked by 1 person

    • January 8, 2017 at 8:59 am

      Thank you so much Danielle! This means everything ❤ (I’m enjoying yours too!! 😊)

      Like

  5. Tee
    January 9, 2017 at 12:40 am

    Beautiful, Claire. I’ve wondered why no-one seems afraid to say they want to be a surgeon or an accountant, but it seems to take such guts to admit that you want to write, and to pour your heart into something and open it to others… you’ve captured and articulated that beautifully. You’ve definitely done the right thing. It’s a joy to read your posts. Hope you’ll keep sharing with us!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. January 14, 2017 at 12:36 am

    Oh my goodness, how I relate to this, on so many levels. I always knew I was a writer. I knew it deep down in my bones. But for the longest time, it was my secret, and my secret alone.

    I especially understand what a huge step it is to start a blog. When I finally mustered up enough courage to hit the publish button on my very first post a little over a year ago, I seriously thought I was going to hurl.

    But it definitely gets easier with time, and sharing your writing with the world actually starts to feel freeing and gratifying all at once.

    You are an excellent writer, and I’m glad that you also managed to muster up the courage to share your writing with the world. Keep it up! 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    • January 14, 2017 at 12:46 am

      Aww I’m so glad you liked it 😊 and I’m really pleased I’m not the only one to feel like this!
      I absolutely love reading your posts, so I’m glad you decided to start a year ago too 😊 thanks for the lovely comment 😊

      Liked by 1 person

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